Tuesday, November 10, 2009
Tuesday, November 20, 2007
Blood Of the Maple
ED: Have you secured the holy trinity, Satan?
GEORGE: Ready and loaded. I even nailed two slices of French toast to the doorpost so the snow, ice, and freezing rain will pass over me.
ED: I’m glad we have our milk, bread, and eggs, too. Jen and Leslie are safe; we all are. Just don’t forget the syrup. It’s the critical element.
GEORGE: Syrup?
ED: Of course. The storm will only pass over us if we smear the blood of the maple on the French toast and door.
(GEORGE runs to the cabinet and opens the cabinet door and takes out the maple syrup. He marches proudly around waving the bottle.)
GEORGE: Hal-le-fucking-lujah. I do have the blood of the maple. I am saved!
ED: It’s a good thing I reminded you. You could’ve been buried under two inches of snow. Though you would’ve been comforted by the French toast.
GEORGE: On the way home from the gym, as sparse flakes were a flutterin’ around, I noticed that the Super Fresh and Shop Rite were fucking packed with people getting milk, bread, and eggs because we may get a few inches of snow followed by freezing rain. Won’t be able to leave home for days, but we got our French toast and syrup! We will live!
ED: I’m far too tense for such a life and death mission. Luckily, Jen dealt with the insanity this afternoon…even though the snow ain’t due for another nine hours, at 1:30 the registers were already six people deep. Yeah, Collegeville is a people capital; yeah, it’s Friday; lots of people do shop on Fridays, usually we’re amongst them...but every fucking winter, every threat of a storm, the clueless masses stock up on the staples…I saw a woman on the news with five gallons of milk! Five fucking gallons?
GEORGE: I have always said it is a racket between the supermarkets and the accu-guess stations: milk the ratings and move product during the retail blight of January, February, and early March!
ED: Who knew the important of French toast! You never see it on the pyramid of nutrition.
GEORGE: Constantine and the Counsel cut that from the Bible…people couldn’t handle the truth.
ED: You seem to be in true Satan mode.
GEORGE: Yes, my humble narrator…the moloko plus horrorshow is just kicking in! But I gotta run Henry...See ya...remember the Holy Trinity…more snow is on the way.
GEORGE: Ready and loaded. I even nailed two slices of French toast to the doorpost so the snow, ice, and freezing rain will pass over me.
ED: I’m glad we have our milk, bread, and eggs, too. Jen and Leslie are safe; we all are. Just don’t forget the syrup. It’s the critical element.
GEORGE: Syrup?
ED: Of course. The storm will only pass over us if we smear the blood of the maple on the French toast and door.
(GEORGE runs to the cabinet and opens the cabinet door and takes out the maple syrup. He marches proudly around waving the bottle.)
GEORGE: Hal-le-fucking-lujah. I do have the blood of the maple. I am saved!
ED: It’s a good thing I reminded you. You could’ve been buried under two inches of snow. Though you would’ve been comforted by the French toast.
GEORGE: On the way home from the gym, as sparse flakes were a flutterin’ around, I noticed that the Super Fresh and Shop Rite were fucking packed with people getting milk, bread, and eggs because we may get a few inches of snow followed by freezing rain. Won’t be able to leave home for days, but we got our French toast and syrup! We will live!
ED: I’m far too tense for such a life and death mission. Luckily, Jen dealt with the insanity this afternoon…even though the snow ain’t due for another nine hours, at 1:30 the registers were already six people deep. Yeah, Collegeville is a people capital; yeah, it’s Friday; lots of people do shop on Fridays, usually we’re amongst them...but every fucking winter, every threat of a storm, the clueless masses stock up on the staples…I saw a woman on the news with five gallons of milk! Five fucking gallons?
GEORGE: I have always said it is a racket between the supermarkets and the accu-guess stations: milk the ratings and move product during the retail blight of January, February, and early March!
ED: Who knew the important of French toast! You never see it on the pyramid of nutrition.
GEORGE: Constantine and the Counsel cut that from the Bible…people couldn’t handle the truth.
ED: You seem to be in true Satan mode.
GEORGE: Yes, my humble narrator…the moloko plus horrorshow is just kicking in! But I gotta run Henry...See ya...remember the Holy Trinity…more snow is on the way.
Friday, November 16, 2007
Live Free or Live in Bushworld
RUTHANN: Live free or live in Bushworld! No way I can live in Bushworld!
GEORGE: The left wing bleeding hearts want more humane death sentences: even lethal injection is to extreme now for convicted mass murders, serial killers, and rapists. Huh? The criminal in this case only raped and tortured three innocent teenage girls with a broomstick and hammer before killing them, and then he finished his fun with dismemberment, easier to dispose of the meat as he said. He went through the judicial system on the taxpayers’ dime, was found guilty without a doubt, and got his fair and speedy trail. Yet more taxpayers money is being spent worrying if lethal inject is cruel and unusual punishment for him. I know what the constitution says, but why does this guy deserve even more legal protection?
RUTHANN: If we live in such a civilized society, why is he so barbaric? Three young women are dead, and the bleeding hearts care more about the killer than the victims he killed, know his name, not the dead teenagers. I prefer something more Draconian. Just rape the killer with a broomstick and beat him to death with a hammer, then dismember him. The families of the victims will at least know he won’t rape, kill, and dismember anyone else’s daughters…Ever!…may not stop other broken people from killing, but the victims do get some closure…Justice…until we live in that civilized world that some people claim we already live in…
GEORGE: Morality, justice, religion, and hypocrisy drive me nuts. I do not want to be an atheist, but the theists drive me nuts…I do relate to Zen and Tao much better than Christianity…I grew up Catholic…Roman Catholic…dad died when I was seven…and god protects the ones whose lives he fucks up…part of the we are all shit and sinners deal, born of an omnipotent god, in his image, yet we reek of original sin, and we had no say in the egg and sperm waltz.
RUTHANN: If I had a vote, a say in being born, I would have returned the gift I never wanted or asked for…because upon birth, I’m given original sin just because its part of the Cecil B. DeMille production…just to weird for me...Plus, it’s funny; old school Catholics just ain’t in no more. Now we have all the Protestant-lite flavors…what if Jesus and God hate the whole Protestant Reformation...but my favs are the Born Again Yappists who believe every single word in the Bible is absolute truth…talking snakes...but I wonder if they know “In the beginning” was not a phrase in the Hebrew language of the time…a better translation would be like “Starting out in the watery chaos,” if I remember right.
ED: Still not one shred of evidence King Solomon ever played the game, no ark of the covenant, or ark, no grail…who needs facts when you have faith…but the Yappists know they are right, their god is bigger and better than every other Christian or non-Christian god, their Jesus rules….the arrogance of people to actually believe they are the only ones who are saved…have the puzzle all put together…the Fundamentalist Yappists, Pat Robertson, Ann Coulter, Bush and Dick, all made in the twisted image of their god.
RUTHANN: King Bush and the Fundamentalists’ homophobic and misogynistic god…if every word in the Bible is true, then the First Epistle to Timothy proves god is a misogynist. “I do not permit a woman to teach or to have authority over a man; she is to keep silent.” Even the Fundamentalists are now following god’s misogyny, and they have the balls to mock the Catholics…total hypocrisy…and the Catholics will let pedophiles teach god’s word but not women. Women still cannot teach god’s word to men. No way god will silence women!
GEORGE: I detest that my old Catholic goombahs are still totally against women in their all male vocation…but they still protect and reassign pedophiles who can spread god’s word and love…it’s in the by-laws…we don’t have to tell the police…molest away…god is on our side…keep them woman silent though…no wonder I am still a born again atheist. I was a born again agnostic for a long time, but a true agnostic must believe in something, and it became harder and harder for me to put into words what I actually might believe in…now, I have no fucking clue anymore, but ban religion, save lives.
GEORGE: The left wing bleeding hearts want more humane death sentences: even lethal injection is to extreme now for convicted mass murders, serial killers, and rapists. Huh? The criminal in this case only raped and tortured three innocent teenage girls with a broomstick and hammer before killing them, and then he finished his fun with dismemberment, easier to dispose of the meat as he said. He went through the judicial system on the taxpayers’ dime, was found guilty without a doubt, and got his fair and speedy trail. Yet more taxpayers money is being spent worrying if lethal inject is cruel and unusual punishment for him. I know what the constitution says, but why does this guy deserve even more legal protection?
RUTHANN: If we live in such a civilized society, why is he so barbaric? Three young women are dead, and the bleeding hearts care more about the killer than the victims he killed, know his name, not the dead teenagers. I prefer something more Draconian. Just rape the killer with a broomstick and beat him to death with a hammer, then dismember him. The families of the victims will at least know he won’t rape, kill, and dismember anyone else’s daughters…Ever!…may not stop other broken people from killing, but the victims do get some closure…Justice…until we live in that civilized world that some people claim we already live in…
GEORGE: Morality, justice, religion, and hypocrisy drive me nuts. I do not want to be an atheist, but the theists drive me nuts…I do relate to Zen and Tao much better than Christianity…I grew up Catholic…Roman Catholic…dad died when I was seven…and god protects the ones whose lives he fucks up…part of the we are all shit and sinners deal, born of an omnipotent god, in his image, yet we reek of original sin, and we had no say in the egg and sperm waltz.
RUTHANN: If I had a vote, a say in being born, I would have returned the gift I never wanted or asked for…because upon birth, I’m given original sin just because its part of the Cecil B. DeMille production…just to weird for me...Plus, it’s funny; old school Catholics just ain’t in no more. Now we have all the Protestant-lite flavors…what if Jesus and God hate the whole Protestant Reformation...but my favs are the Born Again Yappists who believe every single word in the Bible is absolute truth…talking snakes...but I wonder if they know “In the beginning” was not a phrase in the Hebrew language of the time…a better translation would be like “Starting out in the watery chaos,” if I remember right.
ED: Still not one shred of evidence King Solomon ever played the game, no ark of the covenant, or ark, no grail…who needs facts when you have faith…but the Yappists know they are right, their god is bigger and better than every other Christian or non-Christian god, their Jesus rules….the arrogance of people to actually believe they are the only ones who are saved…have the puzzle all put together…the Fundamentalist Yappists, Pat Robertson, Ann Coulter, Bush and Dick, all made in the twisted image of their god.
RUTHANN: King Bush and the Fundamentalists’ homophobic and misogynistic god…if every word in the Bible is true, then the First Epistle to Timothy proves god is a misogynist. “I do not permit a woman to teach or to have authority over a man; she is to keep silent.” Even the Fundamentalists are now following god’s misogyny, and they have the balls to mock the Catholics…total hypocrisy…and the Catholics will let pedophiles teach god’s word but not women. Women still cannot teach god’s word to men. No way god will silence women!
GEORGE: I detest that my old Catholic goombahs are still totally against women in their all male vocation…but they still protect and reassign pedophiles who can spread god’s word and love…it’s in the by-laws…we don’t have to tell the police…molest away…god is on our side…keep them woman silent though…no wonder I am still a born again atheist. I was a born again agnostic for a long time, but a true agnostic must believe in something, and it became harder and harder for me to put into words what I actually might believe in…now, I have no fucking clue anymore, but ban religion, save lives.
Republican Hypocrisy
ED: First, for you Satan…The limits of my language are the limits of my world.
GEORGE: Brav-fucking-oh Henry…but Wittgenstein was gay…he is banned in Bushworld…you are now also banned!!!
ED: After I read the paper the other day, I got my cardboard and pencils and got busy. Be Republican, It is easier than thinking…and they are proud of their new motto. “He may be morally bankrupt, but Mark Foley didn’t kill anyone.” Their new sound byte, their new chant as they defend Mark Foley and compare him to Ted Kennedy…Dennis Hastert said the same thing: “I didn’t protect a criminal. Foley didn’t kill anyone.”…What great campaign strategy. We’re Republicans: Hypocrites, but we didn’t kill anyone!…funny how the Republicans are so anti-gay and pro-family until it affects the war machine leading into an election, then they embrace gay behavior. Foley just has a drinking problem. Once out of the rahab, his craving for young males will disappear!!!
Funny how Republicans don’t want the government to interfere in the raping of the land, air, or water, but women’s bodies, gay marriage, and sodomy nicely fit their agenda…Why should the government legislate sexuality?…Why should the government tell a woman what she can and cannot do to her body?…How can a government say to a woman, too bad your pregnancy was the result of incest and rape, abortion is no option…life is sacred at all costs…just suck it up…Be Republican, here’s your bootstraps!
The Government of South Dakota decrees a woman has to live with the pregnancy of incest and rape…arrogant enough to tell a woman you have to love the child forced upon her by a rapist for nine short months. The arrogance to force a child to know your mom never wanted you simply because you were forced on her by a criminal, maybe even her father, your grandfather…but your life is sacred, just forget your dad is in jail…just visit him on Father’s Dad at the penitentiary…biological parenthood is over-rated anyway…your next mom and dad will love you dearly. Welcome to the ownership society…here’s your bootstraps…welcome to luck of the draw foster care world, and the nightmare of the child welfare system…funny how the sanctity of life for Republicans is only from conception to birth. Because after your precious birth, don’t look to the GOP for assistance with health care, education, or housing, for they will only hand you more bootstraps. And if you run afoul of the law and really fuck up, remember that Republicans love the death penalty. Suddenly, your sacred birth ain’t so sacred.
Amazing too that the blue states are on the coasts and are the targets of the terrorists and not thrilled with Bushworld…However, all the Republican Bubbas in red-middle and southern America, rednecks with shotguns, rifles, corn silos, and cattle all feel safe in Bushworld…can you imagine? Like the terrorists are recruiting suicide bombers to launch launch jihad on corn silos and cattle…Bush is our Bubba…
GEORGE: Brav-fucking-oh Henry…but Wittgenstein was gay…he is banned in Bushworld…you are now also banned!!!
ED: After I read the paper the other day, I got my cardboard and pencils and got busy. Be Republican, It is easier than thinking…and they are proud of their new motto. “He may be morally bankrupt, but Mark Foley didn’t kill anyone.” Their new sound byte, their new chant as they defend Mark Foley and compare him to Ted Kennedy…Dennis Hastert said the same thing: “I didn’t protect a criminal. Foley didn’t kill anyone.”…What great campaign strategy. We’re Republicans: Hypocrites, but we didn’t kill anyone!…funny how the Republicans are so anti-gay and pro-family until it affects the war machine leading into an election, then they embrace gay behavior. Foley just has a drinking problem. Once out of the rahab, his craving for young males will disappear!!!
Funny how Republicans don’t want the government to interfere in the raping of the land, air, or water, but women’s bodies, gay marriage, and sodomy nicely fit their agenda…Why should the government legislate sexuality?…Why should the government tell a woman what she can and cannot do to her body?…How can a government say to a woman, too bad your pregnancy was the result of incest and rape, abortion is no option…life is sacred at all costs…just suck it up…Be Republican, here’s your bootstraps!
The Government of South Dakota decrees a woman has to live with the pregnancy of incest and rape…arrogant enough to tell a woman you have to love the child forced upon her by a rapist for nine short months. The arrogance to force a child to know your mom never wanted you simply because you were forced on her by a criminal, maybe even her father, your grandfather…but your life is sacred, just forget your dad is in jail…just visit him on Father’s Dad at the penitentiary…biological parenthood is over-rated anyway…your next mom and dad will love you dearly. Welcome to the ownership society…here’s your bootstraps…welcome to luck of the draw foster care world, and the nightmare of the child welfare system…funny how the sanctity of life for Republicans is only from conception to birth. Because after your precious birth, don’t look to the GOP for assistance with health care, education, or housing, for they will only hand you more bootstraps. And if you run afoul of the law and really fuck up, remember that Republicans love the death penalty. Suddenly, your sacred birth ain’t so sacred.
Amazing too that the blue states are on the coasts and are the targets of the terrorists and not thrilled with Bushworld…However, all the Republican Bubbas in red-middle and southern America, rednecks with shotguns, rifles, corn silos, and cattle all feel safe in Bushworld…can you imagine? Like the terrorists are recruiting suicide bombers to launch launch jihad on corn silos and cattle…Bush is our Bubba…
To H. L. With Everything
I have run out of things to say, so I will let H. L. Mencken speak for me. Even though he wrote mainly in the 1920s, 1930s, and 1940s, he words are still right on target.
Every decent man is ashamed of the government he lives under.
Giving every man a vote has no more made men wise and free than Christianity has made them good.
The government consists of a gang of men exactly like you and me. They have, taking one with another, no special talent for the business of government; they have only a talent for getting and holding office.
The men the American public admire most extravagantly are the most daring liars; the men they detest most violently are those who try to tell them the truth.
The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary.
Under democracy one party always devotes its chief energies to trying to prove that the other party is unfit to rule - and both commonly succeed, and are right.
On July 26, 1920, the acerbic and cranky scribe wrote in The Baltimore Sun: " . . . all the odds are on the man who is, intrinsically, the most devious and mediocre — the man who can most easily (and) adeptly disperse the notion that his mind is a virtual vacuum. The presidency tends, year by year, to go to such men. As democracy is perfected, the office represents, more closely, the inner soul of the people. We move toward a lofty ideal. On some great and glorious day, the plain folks of the land will reach their heart's desire at last, and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron."
Every decent man is ashamed of the government he lives under.
Giving every man a vote has no more made men wise and free than Christianity has made them good.
The government consists of a gang of men exactly like you and me. They have, taking one with another, no special talent for the business of government; they have only a talent for getting and holding office.
The men the American public admire most extravagantly are the most daring liars; the men they detest most violently are those who try to tell them the truth.
The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary.
Under democracy one party always devotes its chief energies to trying to prove that the other party is unfit to rule - and both commonly succeed, and are right.
On July 26, 1920, the acerbic and cranky scribe wrote in The Baltimore Sun: " . . . all the odds are on the man who is, intrinsically, the most devious and mediocre — the man who can most easily (and) adeptly disperse the notion that his mind is a virtual vacuum. The presidency tends, year by year, to go to such men. As democracy is perfected, the office represents, more closely, the inner soul of the people. We move toward a lofty ideal. On some great and glorious day, the plain folks of the land will reach their heart's desire at last, and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron."
Friday, October 12, 2007
Protection From What?
If Bush's Protect America Act and the Patriot Act along with the warrantless wire-taps are so legal, why do the communication companies need amnesty and protections? Seems to me the communication companies would only need protection and amnesty if their eavesdropping and information gathering was illegal...and even more sickening, is the Dems are going to cave in like the spineless creatures they are and give King George freedom to spy on Americans all he wants, 4th amendment be damned...
and the right wing lunatic fringe continues to attack a 12 year boy recovering from a coma and car accident...just shows that the party of morals and family and religion only thinks life is sacred when it is in the womb...pro-life...pro-life until the life is born, then if the sacred life needs health care or education or assistance suddenly the life ain't so sacred anymore...and if you don't speak Bushspeak, we will attack and smear you for not following along...just shows how bankrupt the right wing's view of religion really is...the hypocrisy never ends in Bushworld...
and the right wing lunatic fringe continues to attack a 12 year boy recovering from a coma and car accident...just shows that the party of morals and family and religion only thinks life is sacred when it is in the womb...pro-life...pro-life until the life is born, then if the sacred life needs health care or education or assistance suddenly the life ain't so sacred anymore...and if you don't speak Bushspeak, we will attack and smear you for not following along...just shows how bankrupt the right wing's view of religion really is...the hypocrisy never ends in Bushworld...
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